Out of the Loop
by YappiChick
Summary: “Well, if you would excuse me,” Carson said, looking at Keller, “it seems as if I need to catch up on a lot of things." Spoilers/Spectulation for season 5.
1. Chapter 1

**Spoilers: Everything up through season 4, spoilers for season 5. Ye be warned. :D  
Author's notes: A big thanks to Ruby for being an awesome beta! Thank you!!**

* * *

There was light and then there was darkness.

Then, after many weeks, there was light again.

Carson Beckett slowly regained consciousness. Standing in front of him was Major Lorne. For a few seconds, Carson couldn't hear what he was saying.

Finally, he was able to process some of Lorne's words. "Doc? Can you hear me?" the major asked slightly impatiently.

Carson nodded slowly. "Aye, what's going on?"

Lorne flashed a smile, glad to see the Scot responding. "We have got a bit of a situation," he said cryptically.

"And that is?" Carson knew "situations" on Atlantis were a near weekly occurrence.

"Colonel Sheppard and his team found Teyla. They are headed back to Atlantis and should be here within the next five minutes," Lorne explained, leading Carson out of the status _stasis_pod room. "They've got Teyla's baby with them."

"Who delivered it? Not Michael, I hope," the doctor said with distaste.

Lorne shot him a look as if to say, _you're not going to believe this. _"According to the colonel, McKay did."

Carson put his hand on his forehead. "That poor child," he said dryly. "Teyla's lucky Rodney didn't pass out when she was in labor."

Lorne couldn't suppress his grin. "Anyway, Dr. Keller wants you to check the baby to make sure Michael didn't do anything to him while she makes sure everything is alright with Teyla."

"How does she know I'm not going to, you know…" Carson asked, unwilling to finish his question. Carson knew that before he stepped into the stasispod, he only had a few hours left to live.

"Back on Michael's ship, McKay found the chemical compound Michael used to keep you alive. Somehow, he figured out a way to transmit it to Atlantis. Dr. Keller has been working for the past several hours trying to recreate it." He looked at Carson. "Apparently it worked."

Carson grinned. "Aye, I'd say it did."

When they walked into the infirmary, Keller and a couple of nurses were wheeling Teyla into the room. John was holding a squirmy baby in his arms while Rodney and Ronon looked helplessly at the action in the room.

Carson rushed to the colonel's side. "I'll take the wee little one," he said, taking the baby from his arms. For a second, John didn't let go. "Don't worry, Colonel, it will only be for a few minutes," Carson assured him.

John nodded, his attention focused on Teyla on the bed.

Carson nodded to Rodney to follow him to an examination table. "So, I heard you delivered him," the doctor said incredulously.

"Don't sound too surprised. It's actually not the first baby I've delivered," Rodney said defensively.

"Really?" Carson said, as he removed the blanket from the baby.

"Yes," Rodney said, folding his arms. "By the way, it's good to see you, well, alive."

Carson couldn't help but grin at his friend's bluntness. "Thank you," he said sincerely before continuing checking the baby.

"Make sure he doesn't fall off the table. I need to get my stethoscope," Carson said. When Rodney moved to the table, he walked to the drawer that always held his things.

It was full of diapers.

He tried to ignore the anguish that passed through him; it wasn't their fault that they didn't know when, or if, they were going to be able to revive him. Still, it affected him more than he thought it would.

"Try the box over there," Rodney suggested.

Carson did as Rodney instructed and was greeted by all of his belongings. He glanced at Keller, who had heard Rodney. "I didn't have time to move your stuff back over," she explained. "The infirmary has become a baby supply room, but we'll find a place for your things."

"Thank you," he said, holding the stethoscope in his hands.

Quickly, he finished examining the baby. "Well, he seems perfectly healthy. I can't see any signs that Michael did anything to him, but we'll run some blood tests to be sure."

The baby looked at him suspiciously as he prepared the syringe. Carson knew drawing blood wasn't going to be easy. He looked around the room and spotted John.

"Hey Daddy, come here," he called to the colonel.

The whole room went silent.

"Um, Carson, the baby isn't his," Rodney whispered.

Color stained Carson's cheeks. "Then who is the bloody father?" he hissed.

"Kanaan. He, uh, didn't make it off the ship," John answered, coming to the doctor's side. "Was there something you needed, doc?"

"I was going to ask if you could hold the baby while I drew some blood." He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry that I made you uncomfortable."

"Nah, didn't bother me at all," the colonel lied. "Now, what do you want me to do with the little guy?"

"Just hold him still. I don't want him squirming away," Carson said, trying to ignore his embarrassment.

John did as he was instructed, holding the baby firmly in his hands. Carson drew the blood without any problems. "Thank you, Colonel," he said, putting a small bandage on the baby.

As he placed the syringe in the receptacle for testing, Carson noticed that Teyla was waiting for the child. He walked across the room, took the baby from John, and presented him to Teyla. "Here you go," he said kindly, giving her the child. "Have you thought of a name?"

"Not yet," she said softly, looking at the small person.

"Well, if you would excuse me," he said, looking at Keller, "it seems as if I need to catch up on a lot of things."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A few hours later, Carson walked back to the infirmary. After he left earlier, he found Atlantis' most reliable source of gossip, Radek, and had him fill him in on all the juicy details that had happened over the past two years. Still, Carson had a feeling he would be out of the loop for a while.

Thinking about his earlier mistake embarrassed him. How had he so wrongly judged the relationship between John and Teyla? He had seen how upset John was when they found where Michael was holding Teyla. Maybe he was reading into something that wasn't really there.

As he walked inside the room, he noticed Teyla lying in her bed, holding her baby with one arm. Her other hand was busy as she ran her fingers through John's hair. John wassitting in a chair next to her bed, fast asleep against her side.

"I knew it," Carson said quietly, smiling. John might not be the baby's biological father, but Carson knew he would be the only father the little one would ever know.


	2. Chapter 2

-1It was a shell of what it once was.

Carson surveyed his room with sadness. Though he had briefly gone into his quarters after he had been rescued from his prison cell, he was so focused on finding a cure for himself that he didn't pay much attention to it before he went into the status pod.

Now, with his health as stable it could be, he had plenty of time to look at how Atlantis had moved on without him. Rodney had told him rather awkwardly that all of his belongings had been shipped back to Earth after _his _death. The real Carson Beckett.

Carson looked in the mirror on his dresser, studying his face.

Who was he? Would the people here ever accept him as Carson Beckett or would he always be considered the Clone? He forced those thoughts away; there was nothing he could do to change the situation he was in.

Turning away, he noticed a picture in a frame setting on the corner of his nightstand with a post it note attached to it. Immediately, he recognized Rodney's sloppy scrawl.

**Couldn't ship this back to your mother. Thought you'd like it back. -R**

Carson looked at the picture fondly. At least, he knew, Rodney would be accepting of him. He placed the picture on the table where he found it.

As he walked across the room, his door chimed. Quickly, he made his way to the doors. When they slid apart, they revealed Teyla.

"Teyla!" he said, surprised. It was only one day after she had given birth to her son. He hadn't expected her to be walking around Atlantis so soon.

"Carson," she said softly. "May I speak with you?"

Instantly, he was worried; there was something bothering her. Surely she wasn't still upset about his mistake in the infirmary. "Of course, come in," he replied, offering her a chair.

Gingerly, she sat in the chair. "I came to apologize," she explained. "When you tried to save me, I did not--" she stopped, considering her words. "I am sorry," she finally said.

"Teyla, I don't blame you for not coming with me. I'm sure you thought you were seeing a bloody ghost," he assured her, taking a seat on the edge of his bed. "I should be the one apologizing to you. If I was only able to break Michael's hold on me, I could have protected you."

"You know how powerful he is. Do not blame yourself," she said.

A sheepish smile crept on his face. "It's not that easy."

"I know," she admitted. "I am sure you have heard what happened to most of my people."

"Aye," he nodded, sadness creeping into his voice. "He's a monster."

They sat silently together, both lost in their angst. Finally, Carson broke the silence, standing up. "Well, standin' here mopin' isn't going to make us feel any better. I'd better see if Kate has some time for us to start some counseling."

Teyla's eyes widened. "Did no one tell you? Kate died nearly a year ago."

Disbelief was Carson's first reaction. He wondered how many people had been lost over the past two years.

"I'm so sorry," he finally said. He knew the two of them had formed a close friendship over their years on Atlantis.

"There has been much lost." Teyla looked around his barren room as she stood up.

"Aye, but you have a little one now. Colonel Sheppard and the others found me. Perhaps it is time to move forward. There is nothing we can do about the past," he suggested. "Now, go see your son. He is waitin' for you."

Teyla nodded, her mouth forming a wobbly smile. "Thank you," she said, embracing him. "You have been missed."

Maybe, Carson thought as he wrapped his arms around Teyla, there was hope that he would be accepted for who he was now.


End file.
